letters to the future

if laughing is just a joke, then why are we laughing

(Image captured from reddit – https://www.reddit.com/r/joker/comments/deh7gd/this_scene_is_already_iconic_and_it_will_go_down/)

“This is too painful and disturbing to watch.” –  I whispered as I sat there and watched The Joker. 

Why?

Spoiler Alert!

  1. It’s painful to watch him realise that all the things he dreamed of and believed in were all lies. (The comedian role model, her mother’s love)
  2. The lack of empathy in Gotham City. The only thing that Joker wanted is to matter. To feel like you exist. It is disheartening that when he tries his best, no one cares but when he did what’s terrifying, people notice – and he took that clue. Is he only seeking attention OR is that a symptom of a lack of significance?
  3. Where did he go wrong? When did it start? Is it when he become mugged? Or did it start on his laughing condition? Or when he was abused as a child? I really don’t know. In fact, looking backwards might give you a clue but what’s more important is that there REALLY was no one on his side. Trust me- not having any one on your side feels like it is so much better to just disappear. 

Why- why did I even watched this when I know it is doomed from the start?

  1. Joker only wanting to make people laugh. Yet it was taken away from him. The only silver lining in his fucked up life. But people had to go screw it up. Or he did. It broke my heart to pieces when he uttered “I love this job!” when he was getting fired. 
  2. Lastly, when he finally had that dream coming together but not in the way he imagined. He was featured on his favorite show but only to get laughed at, he was invited on that show but his mother can no longer watch his guesting and his idol making fun of him. 

Which brings me to my favorite scene- that one where he was all dressed up and dancing in the stairs on the way to the guesting- I guess he was happy that he will be living his dream OR he is finally coming to terms that everything he ever lived for is all untrue and THIS – what he’s gonna do- is to trample on everything. Ironic isn’t it?

I don’t know why I get so sentimental with people reaching for their dreams and all I wanted, all I really wanted- was for him finding that glimpse of light at the end of that very dark tunnel but alas it did not happen. I thought that that guesting would be it but it was a doorway to destruction. But he chose it, didn’t he? He self-destructed. 

But does he really? Who is the villain here? Him. His medical condition that bothers people. The apathy of everyone. The government that cut off his access to mental health medicines. The comedian who made fun of him. The people who glorified the murder of the Wall Street guys. 

I don’t know. 

Do you?

Are you one of them?

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